Today we honor fathers and have some advice on being the best man, husband, and father you can be.
Estimated reading time: 8 minutes
Watch the video of this teaching at https://www.celllifechurch.tv/best-man-husband-and-father/ or on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/s6ef2gyjLUg
It is Father’s Day here in America. It is a day that we spend honoring our dads. We honor our natural fathers as well as men who have been especially influential in our lives. Father’s Day started almost a century ago and it is a great time to celebrate with our dads.
We do know not everyone had a great father in their life. Some grew up without a dad, and others had a dad that was not honorable. However, there is someone you can honor on this day that was a father figure or mentor who has helped you be the person you are today.
I have three children, all of whom I am very proud of and love. Two of them, my oldest son and my daughter, followed in my footsteps and have served or are serving in the US Navy and my middle son is moving into management at his work and following both his mother’s and my footsteps in leading people. I am a very blessed dad.
As dads, we want to do our best. To be a good dad, you must be a good husband, and to be a good husband, you must be a good man. Today we are going to share some relevant and biblical advice on being the best man, husband, and father you can be.
Every building has a foundation. The stronger the foundation, the bigger and better the building is. A building with a strong foundation can withstand storms better than a building built on a poor foundation. Our lives are the very same. We must build our lives on a good and strong foundation.
Jesus teaches us in Luke 6:47-48:
(47) As for everyone who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice, I will show you what they are like. (48) They are like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on rock. When a flood came, the torrent struck that house but could not shake it, because it was well built.
We usually want to do our best. We typically want to live an honorable and upright life. Being the best person we can be is the foundation of everything we are. We build that foundation by living up to Psalm 15:1-5.
(1) A psalm of David. LORD, who may dwell in your sacred tent? Who may live on your holy mountain? (2) The one whose walk is blameless, who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from their heart; (3) whose tongue utters no slander, who does no wrong to a neighbor, and casts no slur on others; (4) who despises a vile person but honors those who fear the LORD; who keeps an oath even when it hurts, and does not change their mind; (5) who lends money to the poor without interest; who does not accept a bribe against the innocent. Whoever does these things will never be shaken.
David tells us the steps we must take to live an upright life who can live and lead with a clear conscience. He lists many things but we are highlighting only a few.
First, a good man’s walk is blameless, does what is righteous, and speaks the truth from their heart.
A blameless walk is not a perfect one. We all make mistakes and poor decisions at times. The blameless person does not do these things with malicious or selfish intent. They will take responsibility and resolve these mistakes, sins, and misjudgments. This is living righteously, knowing our righteousness comes from our Father in Heaven through the Son, Jesus Christ. In all things, we must speak truth from the heart. Jesus lives in our heart, and that is how we can speak truth from it. Without Jesus in our heart we cannot speak truth from it.
There are many more things David points out, and we encourage you to study those. It takes all these things to build a firm foundation for us to build our lives on, and being a good man is essential to being a good husband.
The next thing in life for a man is to become a husband. The most important relationship you can have as a person is with God through Jesus. The second most important relationship you can have is the one with your spouse. Your spouse comes before anyone else here on earth.
Kelly is not only my wife, but she is also my best friend, ministry partner, and biggest cheerleader, and I am hers. We do not allow anything to come between us. This is only possible because we have both set a firm foundation that we have built our individual lives on, Jesus Christ.
There is a lot of instruction and advice in the Bible for married couples. We want to focus on being the best husband you can be. Let’s read Ephesians 5:25-31.
(25) Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (26) to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, (27) and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. (28) In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. (29) After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— (30) for we are members of his body. (31) “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
Husbands love your wives the same way Jesus loves the Church. He gave up his life for all mankind. He sacrificed everything. If you have truly built your life on the foundations King David described in Psalm 15, loving your wife becomes easy.
Men, love your wives. Respect and honor your wife and show her to be without any imperfection. Love them the way you love yourself. Put your wife before yourself. Care for her and hold her in the highest esteem.
This is exactly how Jesus loves the Church, and he is the perfect example of the love we should have for our wives. A man and wife become one when they marry. Marriage is a holy ordinance that is symbolic of the relationship that Christ has with the Church.
Men, to be the best father you can be, you must first be the best husband you can be to your wife.
Fatherhood usually comes after marriage. You have built your life on the strong foundation of Christ and then married the woman that is your best friend, now children come. Sometimes these children come naturally, and other times they come through other means. I know many great dads of foster children and others who have adopted children.
Once you are a dad, whether naturally or some other way, your life changes forever. You will always be a dad. Your children will always look to you. The direction they go in life can be positively or negatively impacted by you. Rest assured, you are making an impression on your children. Let’s help you make a good impression and impact them positively.
Ephesians 6:4 tells us this:
(4) Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Some translations say, “Fathers, do not provoke your children.” The Apostle Paul is telling us not to be mean or rude to our children. Our children are always watching us. They notice things.
It is said that most communication is not verbal, it is observed through actions and examples. Our children watch us. If you have built your life on the firm foundation of Christ and become a husband who loves his wife the way Christ loves the Church, you are being a great example to your children and can be a very positive influence in their life.
However, do not blame yourself if a child starts making wrong decisions, or does not follow your example and does not follow Christ. God has created each one of us with free will, and we each must decide to follow Christ on our own. If you have a wayward child remember Proverbs 22:6.
(6) Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.
We all make mistakes, and our children sometimes will wander from the path we have set them on. Trust the Lord to surround them with the people they need to get them back on His path. Plant those seeds of faith in their lives, the younger the better. Most often they return to the path of Christ later on in life.
Being the best father requires you to be a great husband. To be a great husband, you must have built your life on the firm foundation of Christ and live a blameless life in righteousness without malice. To build your life on that foundation you must have said yes to Jesus. Dad’s, the best thing you can do for your life, your marriage, and your children, is to start and cultivate a lifelong relationship with Jesus Christ.
Following Jesus is the single best thing you can do to be the best man, husband, and father you can be.
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